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Tuesday, 14 December 2010

Fred: The Movie review

Fred: The Movie (12A, 83 mins)
Director: Clay Weiner
★ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

In which whiny high school kid Fred (Lucas Cruikshank) spends a weekend pining for his neighbour Judy (British popstrel Pixie Lott), talking to the camera or fantasising about them doing musical numbers together that are like High School Musical re-imagined by the Chuckle Brothers. Script, acting and production values are all at a garden shed level and it’s just scene after scene of Fred squealing and throwing a tantrum like a toddler, or moronic slapstick that six year olds would dismiss as childish. And that’s it. Honestly. That’s the film. Five minutes in Fred’s company is taxing; 80-odd minutes of his unspeakable nasal screeching is truly jaw-dropping, hand-over-the-mouth horror, and it’s simply staggering that someone considered this fit for cinema release. All flippancy aside, it’s no laughing matter that some poor unsuspecting souls are going to pay good money to watch this, and the people responsible for that should be ashamed.
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6 comments:

  1. Anonymous25 July 2011 at 15:18

    This review is spot on. I netflix'ed this for a 5 year old child and couldn't take the continuously annoying, high-pitched, nasaly voice and unfunny antics. Thankfully a storm came through and took out our internet service halfway through the movie.

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  2. Guillaume Tanguay7 December 2011 at 12:09

    worst movie i ever saw seriously.

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  3. Anonymous30 December 2011 at 09:50

    I wanted to punch Fred from the first moment he opened his mouth. Agreed w above. Worst movie ever.

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  4. Anonymous25 January 2013 at 23:31

    Worst movie lmao

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  5. Anonymous15 February 2013 at 18:34

    My daughters *never* dump a movie, they are extremely patient... That said, they were willing to give up movie night to run away from this turd. I let them start a new movie, honoring their good judgment.

    This is, no doubt, made by a self-absorbed megalomaniac, or the child of one. Crack is whack... Whoever was in the decision-making process to put this farce onto a screen should lay off of the pipe.

    SDSean

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  6. Anonymous25 June 2013 at 00:24

    Worst movie I ever saw

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